Wall of Love

Testimonials from Couples I've Worked With

These are the words of couples and individuals I've worked with, shared exactly as they wrote them.

Read more about affair recovery therapy and couples therapy.

• We were struggling with bickering, lack of empathy and communication. After our sessions with Shan, our communication improved massively - we don't bicker and we actually listen to each other. We really appreciate each other's company and value each other greatly, more now than we ever have.

• My wife and I decided to see Shan after I was unfaithful.
  We needed help to navigate this crisis in our marriage of 30+ years.
  Shan has been amazing at helping us to confront and discuss difficult issues in a completely non judgemental way.
  Although feeling stressed and anxious before each session , I always came away from each session with a feeling of satisfaction and achievement, and a new constructive energy between my wife and I.
  The use of dialogue to explore difficult and sensitive topics has been very helpful and easy to engage with , and has allowed me to be more open and less resistant to discussing my infidelity.

• Shan's approach to online couples therapy was very helpful for us: a structure that challenged us to express ourselves clearly and be receptive to each other's perspectives; a focus on communicating directly with each other, rather than relying on her as an intermediary; gentle guidance during the sessions, and useful exercises that created new routines and opportunities for connection as homework.

  This intense work has helped us reset unhealthy communication patterns and find connection even in disagreement. We have learned a lot about each other and ourselves. We will continue using the wisdom and tools we acquired during our time with Shan as we navigate our lives together.

• We contacted Shan when we were on the brink of separation after infidelity.  We were totally unsure of our future as a couple, especially as one of us had checked out of our marriage of over 16 years.  Shan was amazing from our first session, putting us both at ease and listening without judgment.  The Imago therapy has been a game-changer for our relationship; enabled us to effectively communicate once again and for us both to feel listened to and appreciated.  The sessions always felt like a safe space for us both, and we were always made to feel at ease.  Our marriage is now stronger than ever, we communicate 100% better than before, and we have newfound respect for each other.  Without Shan’s help and support, we would not have navigated the repercussions of infidelity and would have likely split.

• This is our second testimonial for Shan now that we have come to the end of the journey with her. We started nearly 2 years ago in a place where 1 of us was done with the relationship of 15+ years and we have 2 young children together.

  When all hope was lost and I mean all, with Shans help and guidance we have been able to reconnect and be stronger than we ever have been.

  We have worked hard and talked through all sorts of issues. Communication has improved dramatically. The sessions were always very non judgemental and calm and shan created a safe space for us.

  She's given us the tools and confidence to move forward stronger than ever.

  We tried couples therapy before children a number of years ago and it wasn't a patch on the therapy Shan was able to offer.

  In order for therapy to be successful I believe you have to find the right person. Shan has been that person for us and we are so grateful for her help.

  If you think its the end of your relationship and your reading this then believe me there is still hope.

  We would 100% recommend Shan in a heartbeat and if we ever need to use her in the future then I wouldn't hesitate to call.

  Thank you for everything Shan

• Quite simply, Shan is amazing! My partner and I were having terrible difficulties and were on the brink of separation. Shan was quickly able to put us both at ease and enabled us to open up to each other about the issues we faced and what had driven us to the position that we found ourselves in. With the expert guidance that Shan gave us we worked through everything, in a safe space, where we were both encouraged to be open and honest with each other.
  We are now in the best place that we have ever been in our relationship and will always be grateful for the support that Shan provided us. We would recommend her to any couple.
  Thank you Shan

• We made contact with Shan as we were struggling as a couple/family. We’d been married for 20+ years and had two very difficult adopted children.

  Shan’s approach was totally different to any other therapy we’d tried and we were able to focus on the positives’s not just what wasn’t going well. It was a really safe and structured method and Shan was amazing with her support throughout the sessions.

  We were encouraged to do appreciation and dialogue sessions between our visits to Shan, which had really helped with our communication.

  Highly recommend Shan to any couple who need help in their relationship.

  Thank you Shan for making a difference in our lives 🙏🏻

• We have recently been working with Shan, and we are grateful for the experience. Shan's understanding of relationships, particularly in navigating the painful issues surrounding infidelity, made all the difference. From the moment we began, Shan created a safe, non-judgmental space where we could openly communicate and begin repairing our relationship. Shan's approach allowed us to explore difficult emotions, and learn how to approach communication with more intention and structure.

  What really stood out to us was Shan's ability to listen without judgment, and encourage us to see the others point of view. Shan provided us with the tools we needed to move forward together.

  We cannot recommend Shan enough to any couple dealing with infidelity or other relationship challenges. Thanks to Shan’s guidance, we’ve learned how to communicate more effectively. Shan’s sessions have definitely made a positive impact on our relationship.

• Shan really helped us move forward in our relationship through the power of dialog and safe communication. She gave a safe and open space for us to share potential blocks and we learned to understand each other on a deeper level. Which has helped us work together as a couple as opposed to individuals to overcome any situation we face. Thank you
  anon North Yorkshire

• Shan helped us to navigate a situation that was totally unknown to us. We'd always been good communicators, but she taught us how to be really open to the other's feelings in a way that we hadn't tried before. Without her calm and non judgemental help, we would not have made it through the change in our relationship. Her knowledge of ENM and poly dynamics, and the niche issues that come up as a result, allowed us to feel supported and safe at a time when we were vulnerable and unsure of ourselves. We absolutely recommend her, she has changed how we communicate and our understanding of what makes us, 'us'.

• Shan has been wonderful at helping us understand and listen to each other, during what has been a very difficult time for us. We have felt equally listened to and valued throughout, and we have learned so much about how we each communicate and about what we both need. We have taken so much from Shan’s approach and intend to continue using the techniques taught.
  Thank you so much :)
  A&A, Yorkshire

• Shan has been an amazing guide through a desperate time. We were struggling with trust issues following infidelity and the imago technique has been great at bringing safety within our communication with each other. We like that we have enough time to really deep dive into issues as opposed to more conventional therapy which is typically 50 minutes and feels like it is over before you have even started. A greater sense of empathy and connection has developed over our time with Shan and would wholeheartedly recommend this to anyone going through similar issues. Thanks so much Shan!

• We are a couple in our 40s who practice ENM. Shan supported us in the journey of opening up our marriage. We knew we needed a massive uplevel in our communication which is what we got! What we liked about working with Shan was that she helped us talk in an open, honest way, and get to the core issues that were affecting us. Very much recommend Shan for any couple opening up from monogamy.

• We came to Shan after multiple failed experiences with other "traditional" couple's therapists. Every time we felt further apart and like we were not making any advancement in our relationship. It almost felt like we were on a breaking point.

  Shan's approach helped us gather together our thoughts and vision as a couple and helped us to communicate better with each other and understand each other's perspectives.

  We liked the Imago technique because it makes you listen to your partner and actively think and process their perspective. It doesn't mean you agree with it, but certainly helps you understand better your partner.

  Shan was able to generate off-therapy progress by giving us weekly exercises. These are aimed at improving a particular aspect of our communication. This is something we treasured in our journey to better understand and communicate with each other.

  We have improved massively on our communication and while it is not perfect we put in practice all the learnings in our day to day.
  We are very grateful with Shan for showing us a different path!

• Before contacting Shan, we were a bit lost and struggling to find each other. We were tetchy and distant. Life, post-Covid, with 4 kids, multiple jobs, mortgages and the rest had started to take a toll. We wanted help to reconnect before we drifted apart completely.

  The relationship goals part of the process has been really positive, helping us to think about what we both want. We both like the dialog elements of the couples therapy. It's an unusual way of having a conversation, but it is really effective. Also, Shan has this amazing ability to remember exactly what we say (precisely) which helps us to summarise and understand each other perfectly.

  We really like the way that Shan has helped us to communicate better, to hear one another better and to talk about our problems in a safe and productive way. It's not easy. Sometimes it is really hard. But the approaches and exercises that Shan gives us really help. Some of them are even fun.

  Finally, we're a male/female married couple. Both of us feel completely safe and supported equally by Shan. She's really very good at what she does.

• As a couple we lost touch with each other. Shannon did not judge us or take sides, she listened and made us feel very comfortable and helped rebuild our relationship. highly recommend

• P+M, UK

  We decided to seek help from Shan because we were struggling with unresolved conflicts and issues from the past, which were slowly but surely eroding trust, communication and safety in our relationship.

  We are having virtual sessions with Shan and it’s been really positive. It feels like Shan recognises and understands the issues we are facing. The Imago communication style is a helpful way of ensuring both of us feel heard and validated as we navigate difficult topics. Shan does a brilliant job of guiding us through this, encouraging us to go deeper, and offers really useful reassurance that makes us excited to come back to the next session and proud of the progress we’ve made so far.

  Outside of sessions, we’ve noticed an increased sense of safety in our relationship. When conflicts arise, we have a new and reliable way of communicating about them. We love that the skills we practice through the Imago counselling can be used for many years to come outside of the session and we feel supported in learning how to apply them independently.
  Overall we’d really recommend Shan, especially for couples who are feeling stuck and want to try a new way to approach problems in their relationships, rebuild communication and cultivate emotional safety.

• We had tried regular couples counselling before coming across Shan who has introduced us to imago therapy, which has been really beneficial. Shan provides a safe and calm space where we can talk honestly about really difficult issues, that for years we have been struggling unpick. After each session we learn something new about each other and now feel positive about the future. We wouldn’t have come this far without Shan’s support!! We would definitely recommend her sessions. S & J (UK)

• We have been having therapy with Shan for the last 5 months. Our issues were loss of connection, stuck in old habits and plastering over past issues rather than dealing with them and fixing them. We have been together 17 years and have 2 young children so it's been hard to focus on us.

  We really like that therapy with Shan has helped us open up to each other, be really honest with each other and it's really helping us reconnect when we thought all was lost. Shan has offered us a safe space to communicate, identify and understand our issues and is helping us work towards our relationship vision. We both feel very comfortable opening up in front of Shan and really like the way she uses the imago therapy.

  So far in our journey we are already noticing a change in how we speak to each other, we are much calmer, more considerate and really starting to understand each others needs.

• My partner and I have had a few sessions with Shan over the past few months and I must say, we always go away feeling much more positive and calm, as well as practising the new love language we’ve learnt.
  I love Shan’s approach and she teaches us how to really understand and listen to each other.
  Highly recommend her services!

• We decided to seek couples therapy due to the impact a life changing event had on our marriage and personal life. As a result, we ended up struggling to communicate, lost trust for one another and ultimately it led to us being like strangers; both deeply hurt and traumatised by the past.
  I knew standard couples therapy wasn’t going to work for us, we needed much more; a personalised approach which could build our relationship to be even better so we could work through a difficult time as a team. After finding Shan’s website and reading about the imago approach I was confident we found the right couples therapy to start our healing. Throughout our time with Shan we have not only become more connected and stronger in our marriage, we are also happier parents for our children too. The imago dialogue and appreciation practice approach have enabled us to communicate again and successfully work towards our relationship vision. I can’t express enough how amazing this approach is and how comfortable and understanding Shan makes you feel during the sessions. She is part of your team and supports you every step of the way to reaching your desired outcomes and vision. My husband and I are in a much happier and healthier place, and we continue to practice our appreciation for each other daily and use the tools taught to us through the imago relationship therapy. This approach isn’t a quick fix but an immersed experience that you can take with you and continue to build a success marriage for the future.
  A & G from Ripon, North Yorkshire.

• We came to couples therapy with Shan to work through an affair. In the beginning my partner was still seeing the affair person. Shan supported us both through this really painful time. I was scared it wouldn't be possible but we've been rebuilding our relationship. We're at the stage now where we both feel hopeful for the future. Can't thank you enough Shan.

• We are a blended family with 5 children between us. Shan helped us with communication, parenting differences and resolving conflict. We had 12 sessions in total and it's gone very well, a big change in our relationship. Thank you

• We are a female couple who worked with Shan for about 6 weeks. Shan was very supportive of both of us and allowed the room to be a safe space. What we both really liked was the actual practice. We found it beneficial and something that we could also do at home.

  Highly Recommend.

• We approached Shan to help us work through an affair.

  Before: We were at breaking point.

  During: Shan helped us talk without fighting. This was very hard at first. Over time we learned to see how we had both neglected and hurt each other. We used tools to help us see the positive in each other again which really helped our connection.

  After: I wouldn't want anyone to experience an affair and have this shatter their lives but our relationship is now better than before. We should have come years ago. Thank you for all your help Shan.

• My husband and I reached out to Shannon following a deceit in our relationship. We felt the only way we could navigate this challenging time was to seek out therapy. Enter Shannon. From the initial phonecall, I knew that her approach and tact was right for us. We then underwent numerous sessions with Shannon following the Imago therapy approach and it worked incredibly well at allowing us to appreciate one another as well as have dialogue about sticking points leading to the indiscretion. The space Shannon provided was safe and welcoming. Although our therapy with Shannon has now ended, our relationship is stronger and our connection rebuilt. There is still work to do but we know we have the springboard from Shannon to help us with this.
  Anonymous. UK

• Shan was the second marriage counsellor we tried. We both really liked the Imago method that Shan introduced us to. It really makes a lot of sense and we finally began making real progress! Shan clearly draws from a wealth of professional and personal experience. We are truly grateful for her helping us through that period in our marriage.

• BEFORE:
  Before we worked with Shan, our relationship was tense and confrontational. We were totally stuck, tangled and unable to deal with our differences in opinion.
  DURING:
  The work was challenging, but we felt it was a safe place to express our thoughts, feelings and difficulties. Although it was hard to hear the other's point of view it was an eye-opener to how we were both feeling. We were able to explore our difficulties and learn to actively listen. It definitely gave us a new narrative for our marriage, with a focus on a positive framework.
  AFTER:
  Our relationship is much better, less tense. We use the practices regularly. It no longer feels threatening to disagree. We are working towards the goals we set.

• BEFORE
  We both love each other, but there was a lot of anger, frustration, and resentment. We treated each other like we didn't like each other anymore.
  DURING
  We both had a massive shift in our thinking.
  AFTER
  We've put our wedding rings back on and recommitted to each other.

• AFTER:
  "Things are a million times better than when we started 😃"

• Shan helped us get to the core of our issues quickly. She was kind and non judgemental and made us feel at ease. I would definitely recommend her

• I don’t normally write these things but I have to recommend Imago couples therapy! Shan is a good, very kind and fair therapist who showed us how to to do it ourselves so we didn’t need a lot of sessions.

• I first approached Shan several years ago so I could gain support with processing the ending of a relationship, and learn from the situation. I had such an exceptional experience of learning and growing via her coaching, that I agreed to work with her again, immediately. I was learning and evolving so much, I couldn't just cease my time with her. I wasn't ready.

  I can honestly say that Shan has been one of the most influential people in my adult life when it has come to learning more about my past self, my present self, and how to communicate my needs and wants for a better life. I have consciously taken action precisely as she has directed, and I feel like a different person today (for the better) as a result.

  It's not just about what I've learned via Shan and the information she has shared with me - it is 'how' she does it. I have learned via her approach. I didn't realize at first how much I needed to learn there is a 'safe space' in the world to express thoughts and feelings - despite working with so many other coaches and professionals since I was a young teenager (I'm now in my late 40s). Shan will never gaslight or invalidate or dismiss your experiences. She will hold space for you. She is an exceptional listener and she listens 'to understand.' Not just to respond.

  On the very rare occasion that I challenged a thought from Shan (purely b/c I could see she didn't receive the full context of a situation from me), she was just fantastic. I was stunned at her grace, her kindness, her maturity and emotional intelligence. Again, she listened. She absorbed. She asked questions. She validated me. She made me feel important. My issues were important to her, because they were important to me. Shan genuinely cares. You cannot fake that. Her sincerity shines through her work.

  Even after two years of working on my own, since my year with Shan, I recently engaged Shan's services to assist me with a specific situation that arose in my life. I knew that by speaking with Shan, I would learn how to manage the situation, aligned with my highest self, so that I could handle not only this one situation - but any similar situation in the future (and handle it on my own). Again, it was like 'coming home' to a dear friend who held space and patience for me. I gained precisely the guidance and support I needed.

  I am truly grateful for Shan. She is an absolute gift in this world. I cannot speak highly enough about her. As I have said to her several times before, she was born to do this work. She is precisely where she is meant to be - helping this world to become a better place, via her skill, emotional intelligence, and kindness, touching one human being at a time.

• I started working with Shan several years ago. I reached out to her as I was experiencing complications in my personal relationships that resulted in sensations of confusion and anxiety. I immediately felt at ease working through my issues with Shan due her empathic approach and I was also impressed by her ability to help me explore the root causes of my experiences.

  Due to our sessions, my perceptions of my situation changed immeasurably and I was able to find a much greater sense of peace in my relationships as well as an enhanced knowledge of myself in the process.

• I am on the spectrum and have often found therapists a little vague in their advice, so had been looking for someone to give me no nonsense direct communication and Shan was exactly that! Her sessions were totally invaluable and she was completely flexible in session style (sometimes we discussed more generally about relationship issues, sometimes it was a bit more of a quick fire Q&A session). Since having my sessions with Shan, my outlook on dating has completely changed for the better and I feel much more confident in my abilities. Cannot recommend her enough!

• I was having a really difficult time processing an old relationship and needed to put the work in myself and my current relationship to not let my past traumas impact us. I've always struggled in identifying my feelings and processing events in my life, and working with Shan has helped give me a safe space to be able to do that. My relationship has also benefited from the work we have done in our sessions, especially seeing how strong our communication has become. I'm so grateful for my sessions with Shan and really look forward to continuing our sessions together.

• I have been working with Shannon for three years now.

  I have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. I had always relied on coping mechanisms such as dissociation and other ways of distracting myself from my feelings. My anxiety was very limiting and made it hard to participate fully in my studies and career. I also felt dissatisfied in my relationships as I didn’t feel able to be my authentic self, or even know how to be my authentic self. I found it difficult to identify how I really felt at any moment. I felt very disconnected from myself and under the surface I had low self-worth.

  Shannon helped me get to a place where I felt safe to be curious about my feelings rather than being afraid of them. She helped me to understand what was going on when I experienced difficult feelings. She gave me a safe space to feel and express my feelings, and she made me feel validated and cared for. She also made me feel safe to be authentic in our sessions, which is very important to me and has helped me to show up more authentically in my other relationships. I’m not sure how to describe the positive impact this safe space has had on my life, other than that it has helped me to feel more safe and present in the world.

  I decided to come off my medication (SSRIs) while working with Shannon and I have now been off them for 2 years. Shannon's support has really helped me with this.

  I have grown a lot in the last few years and Shannon has really helped me with that too. I finished my PhD, I’ve become a (relatively) confident public speaker and I have advanced my teaching career. However, probably the most important area of growth for me is that, when I feel difficult emotions, I no longer try to avoid them or run away from them, but I am able to experience them, and soothe myself and show myself love.

  I am still working with Shannon and continuing my journey of getting to know myself and heal myself. It really helps to know that I can speak to her if I feel myself reverting to old coping mechanisms, e.g. in times of stress.

  I would really recommend working with Shannon. My relationship with myself has improved so much since I started working with her, and I’m very grateful to her for that.

  SG, UK

• I’ve been working with Shan since 2021 and she has helped me tremendously in my journey towards healing and self-discovery. Her empathy creates a safe space where I feel heard and understood. She helps me navigate life’s challenges with grace, validation and resilience, offering insights and support every step of the way.

  When I first started my sessions with Shan, I was very confused and completely unaware of my mental state. She was so patient and kind towards my feelings and took time to help me understand what it was that was pushing me towards unhealthy coping mechanisms. I learnt so much about myself and felt extremely validated, helping me with self acceptance and self love.

  We worked on numerous issues each week for about a year and a half. Now I have sessions once a month and have learnt countless skills from her to keep me stable.

  I would highly recommend her to anyone looking into therapy/counselling, I’ll be forever grateful for the growth Shan pushed me towards. She’s a massive factor in making me proud of who I am today.

• Seeing Shan was the best money I ever spent. For me, coming out of a 16-year marriage, the thought of negotiating the dating scene was quite daunting. I had seen friends get hurt and jaded by dating and I didn't want to feel like that. I wanted to protect my heart and soul and I thought there might be a different choice for me, a different way of looking at dating. My friend Lucy encouraged me to see Shan and from that point on I was able to date with a knowledge of my own agency and self-worth. I was also educated with how the dating scene works online which is something I had never thought about before and this was just so useful. One of the best tips that Shan ever gave me was to be in a good frame of mind before going on dating apps and just do 10 minutes a day when I wanted to, and that was brilliant advice. She gave me so many tips, which I now give to other friends. She also helped me to look at men simply as human beings who just happened to be male, see the joyous humanity of the situation, and I just don't think I would have had this attitude if I hadn't seen Shan. My result, I met a great man!

• I have been working with Shannon for about 2.5 years and she has helped immensely navigate my way through relationships and taught me skills to put into practice. Shannon makes me feel heard and that my feelings and emotions are valid and has taught me to believe more in myself. If you are looking for someone to help with your relationship struggles and issues and how to make healthy connections, I recommend Shannon.

• I've been working with Shannon in solo counselling for a few years now and have always been grateful for the patience, understanding, and professionalism she has displayed over our time together. In our sessions she's helped me tremendously to work through everything from childhood, relationship issues, day to day stresses and has helped me learn healthy coping mechanisms suited to my needs and abilities. I highly recommend Shannon as a counsellor.

• I approached Shannon as a single woman who wanted to better understand my patterns in relationship and dating. I felt like I got right to the root of what had been holding me back, which I hadn't achieved with other therapists. She was supportive, empathetic and had a spiritual approach to her work which really resonated with me. Shannon is a fantastic Counsellor and I have already recommended her to a number of people. Thank you Shan. Forever grateful :-)

• This approach is very effective and easily accessible, the teachings are relatable, personable and well founded. Would recommend to read together with your partner as a way to incorporate change. Wonderfully well written and worthwhile!

• I bought Shan's book and also follow her social media accounts. I love her perspective on relationships, so accessible and relatable. Her content always gives new insights and following the method in the book has been so helpful. Highly recommend

• 5 stars!